not so tough

i'm trying to stay upstairs
because i get lost down in the basement
cooler air
frosty floors
the seasons go from cold to colder
i'm always so busy writing
it's all so disconnected
i've got all these ideas and i...
i need to get them into the computer
even if that means no sleep

they said they saw me in the dark one night
pitch black except for the screen
3 am
i didn't resist removal
but my head hits the pillow and i stared
at the clock across the room
at the painting on the wall
out the window to see your plane
flying around, away from here
you're reading the story i wrote and as i'm writing this
letters, i thought, could ONLY be directionless

i was walk, walk, walking
down the street towards the bank
past the street where you used to ask
past the house where you would say
"i wonder what she thinks of this?
i wonder if she sees?
i wonder if she's looking out
and typing numbers just the same?"

but i don't think she's typing anything
and i know for a fact that she's blind
i also know she's been drivin' in circles
and she'll be driving them for all of time

but bring us back down to the letters
i couldn't read them out
i couldn't try
so i lied and got on with life
i went to my job and no one saw in my eyes
but i saw her in other's eyes
even heard her name upon their lips
and i saw you on a screen, so very far away from me
and we're not talking hours here
we're talking days and weeks