my heart hurts
but i ain't in love!
i think it's a mix
of these energy drinks
and tamp down pills
my heart is beating faster
yet slower at the same time
till it finds the in between
but isn't that what i would have started with?
so i drew out drafts and blueprints
sorted shelves of notes and their notebooks
re-read my book
but no
there's a difference
for without the fake drugs and sedatives
and without the real drugs, the real real bad drugs
i wouldn't be relying on anything
and i don't know what i'd do if i didn't have that
it's just a delusional reliance on personificated medication
